Huskar - Soulmate
by sasyst
Summary: Dota fanfiction: Yeah, well, the titel says it all I guess. A soulmate AU About Huskar and Mortred.
1. Prolog

The town had two circles. An inner one, which was the safe zone, and an outer one, both surrounded by walls. In the outer circle was the heart of the town that held the town with all its buildings alive. It was guarded with two towers. Around the heart were several houses and barracks, all on higher ground than the area outside the town. The inner circle was only used by merchants and as regeneration point for the top soldiers, the heroes. The merchants sold mostly weapons and armour suited for everyone, who would fight for their home. And fighting they did.

They were in constant war with their neighbour town and had to defend themselves endlessly. So everyone, male or female, was trained to fight and then sent into battle. It was the only thing they could do, otherwise they would have nothing left. If the heart was destroyed, all buildings of the town would fall apart.

The main goal was to keep the heart of their town safe. And the second one was to attack the enemy, maybe even to destroy the heart of their town. But it was not easy. They had skilled fighters as well and it was an endless struggle, who would become victor of this war. You could not tell, who would win, because the two towns with their soldiers and heroes were equally strong. The balance of power always shifted a little. Depending on which hero was on the field and what items the heroes had been able to buy, the balance could shift with every fight. The heroes were hired from outside to support a town and its soldiers. Both towns were able to hire five heroes, whom they paid and who were resurrected inside of the safe zone with a delay, if they died in one of the fights.

At the present, both towns had still all their towers, in and around the high ground of the heart. There were three ways between the two towns and on each way were two towers of each party. And one more at the three entrances to the towns. If you wanted to destroy the heart you had to get the three towers and one way down and then the two in front of the heart. Five towers minimum. That was not easy to do, because they had some kind of self-defence system, which started firing, as soon as an enemy soldier got into range. Those shots hurt and could easily kill someone, if he or she wasn't strong enough.

Most times, two or three heroes would try to destroy a tower with some soldiers together, to divide the fire power between them all. That way everybody would get injured, but nobody would die. The problem here was, the enemy had soldiers as well, and heroes as strong. They had to kill them first, preferably not under the tower, but outside of its shooting range. Then they could destroy the building.


	2. Chapter 1

I think I don't like chapter one very much. it is strangely chaotic but I wasn't able to pinpoint why, so I left it as it is. I promise it gets better with the next chapters!

* * *

"Hello." As was customary, Huskar the Sacred Warrior greeted everyone he didn't know with showing his wrist. Only two of the four creatures who would be fighting together with him were new. The other two he had already met before. One during a war and one in the most popular inn in their world.

With showing one's wrist, soulmates found each other. Every creature had a symbol on their wrist, a unique pattern of lines and colours. They were very different and only soulmates shared the same symbols. So in presenting wrists, creatures found their mates without having to puzzle about someone being one's mate or not.

Wrists were compared and it was immediately clear if two creatures were meant to be together or not.

Huskar's symbol was a scattered mix of dark and red lines. There were blue lines as well, but they had the shade of his usual skin colour. Only when his body changed were they visible, bright against his then dark skin.

The two heroes in front of him showed their wrists, too. One was a skeleton, with a green glow coming from the inside of his chest. But every creature, even undead ones, had mates and even skeletons had a mark. Huskar was relieved, though, that it didn't in the least resemble his. He wasn't really picky, was sure that fate would do the right thing, but he could imagine better creatures as his partner for life. Especially, since his life was still very long. What was he supposed to do with a skeleton? But, this one wasn't his.

With a nod, the skeleton left the safe zone, in which they were currently all standing, with the other two creatures.

That left Huskar alone with the second creature he didn't know. A female, clad in tight dark clothes, daggers on her belt and a sword in hand. Confident and strong, that was her vibe as she stretched her arm out.

But, there was nothing. The Sacred Warrior blinked, looked up at the female's face, then back at the unmarked skin of her wrist.

"I'm one of the Veiled Sisters. We don't bear any kind of mark on our skin because we are all alike. We don't mate, either, so such a mark would be pointless anyway."

Then she was gone.

Huskar was confused, but the battles would start soon and he had to get to his position. On the way, he pondered what he had just heard. He had never met a creature without a mark, and he had met his fair share of strange creatures throughout the world. Could it really be that there were some, the Veiled Sisters, a group of assassins, that had no such mark? That they were designed, by fate, to go without a mate? It was absolutely new to him and the thought seemed strange and foreign. Wrong somehow.

Mates were important. How could they live without one? How could they live with the knowledge that they'd be alone all their lives?

The thoughts wouldn't leave Huskar alone. At least he was skilled enough in battle he didn't have to think about what he had to do all the time. Otherwise he'd have lost by now.

As it was, he pondered the possibility of the female's statement being true. Because she could as well have hidden the mark. If it was true, and even it if it wasn't, it wouldn't be any of his concern.

It definitely wouldn't, this was just some female without a mark. What did he care about it? He tried to focus on what was going on in front of him, which made him actually win a fight. Because he was that good. He hurled one burning spear after the other at his enemies, the magical fire burning their clothes, their skins, deep into their bones if they didn't back off. Huskar grinned at the burning creatures, revealing his sharp teeth. When one of them flinched, he laughed.

The war was good but Huskar couldn't get the Phantom Assassin and her unmarked skin out of his head. For some reason, it bothered him more than it should and whenever he saw her his gaze shifted to her empty wrist.


	3. Chapter 2

Huskar felt it the moment he wasn't alone in his home anymore. He even thought he saw someone, at the edge of his vision, but when he turned no one was there.

"I'm here to warn you." The voice startled him, first because it came from behind him and second because he knew the voice. And he was right.

The Phantom Assassin blurred with the shadows around her but it was unmistakably the one he had met in the last town war. He was instantly on alert, because the Veiled Sisters were the best assassins and Huskar had never heard of a creature that had lived through being a target of one of them.

"You only get this one warning because I know you. And because I promised to kill you instantly should you not heed it. Stop looking for information about the Veiled Sisters, no matter what kind of information. Maybe you'll find whatever you are looking for, but then you'll get killed anyway and I can't imagine any information is worth dying."

The Sacred Warrior stared at the Assassin. "So you desperately don't want anyone to find anything out about you and your soulmates."

"We don't have soulmates." Her face was completely impassive, as it had been all the time during the town war. It showed absolutely no emotions.

"So you say." But maybe they just didn't want to have a weak spot. And the weakest spot of a creature was always it's soulmate. They wouldn't want anything like that.

"Stop searching. It gains you nothing."

That was where she was wrong. Because Huskar had never been this intrigued about anyone and he supposed it meant something. Well, it could mean something. It didn't have to. But the fact that the Phantom Assassin had showed up in his home meant they were hiding something.

It posed the question, though, why did she come to warn him? The assassins didn't mind killing creatures, they could've just come over and ended it. If he took his interest in her and her coming over to warn him so he wouldn't be killed, and threw it into a pot with the soulmate topic, it was just possible that she was his soulmate.

If the Veiled Sisters had soulmates, then they had the marks. If they had the marks, they hid them somehow. Or removed them. Either way, they knew what their marks had looked like. If the Phantom Assassin had recognized Huskar's mark, she knew that they were mates. Therefore, even though she was an assassin, the best and deadliest of them all, she'd come over to warn him off. So he wouldn't die.

It was a far leap. A very unlikely event. But it was just likely enough to be possible.

And it left Huskar with not knowing what to do next. He didn't believe that the Phantom Assassin would forever refrain from killing him. She had said she'd do it and he believed her. This one warning was as much as she could do. So he had to stop searching for information about the Veiled Sisters and soulmates.

But then, if the Phantom Assassin and he were fated, how could he get her to like him? How could he get her to be with him and to stay with him? She probably wasn't allowed to have a mate, but did she want one? He wanted one. He wanted his mate.

In contrast to many other creatures (including the Veiled Sisters), Huskar believed in fate. If it had selected them to be soulmates, then it had had a reason to do so. The reason wasn't always obvious, was in fact seldom so, but it was always there.

So, how to seduce an assassin? He had never tried to seduce anyone, well, not into staying at least. Getting laid by a creature was easy enough, but to get someone to want to stay one had to be likeable. Not just hot or available. Huskar wasn't sure he was that likeable.

"If I promise to stop searching, would you do me a favour?"

That had gotten her unawares. "What?" But she was an expert and her face didn't show her surprise, not even for a split second. "There is nothing to negotiate. Either you stop or you die."

"I'd like to go on another town war with you." She was an assassin, fighting was what she did. Maybe he could bond with her over that? A town war was the only thing she might agree to. She'd never do anything with him or for him or whatever. But since he knew she went on town wars, why not go on one together.

And really, she hesitated. Then she nodded. "Okay."

Huskar stared. He had hoped for it but he hadn't actually thought she'd say yes. Then he grinned. A wide grin showing all his teeth. The Phantom Assassin didn't react to it. She was neither disturbed nor afraid by the display. Or maybe she just hid it.

He should try to find out if she was scared of him, though it seemed unlikely. It was way more likely that she was disturbed. Or disgusted. Both things were not uncommon when dealing with human or human-like creatures. They had so tiny teeth they didn't know what to do with a troll and his tusks.

"Tomorrow at midday, at the platform by the inn." Without waiting for an answer, the Phantom Assassin walked out of the house. She'd probably teleport away from outside.

There was only one platform that was referred to as 'by the inn'. It was the most popular one, since it was near a main road and a village with lots of merchants and a huge inn. It was not only a meeting point for all the creatures that wanted to go to a town war together but also a place for anyone who needed a special weapon or was searching for someone or something.

So the Phantom Assassin had agreed to go to a town war with Huskar. Now the troll had only to behave and not screw up. The question from before remained: how to seduce an assassin into wanting to stay? She didn't even necessarily have to stay with him, he'd gladly stay with her. Though he supposed the other assassins of her guild wouldn't be thrilled about him strolling around wherever they all met and lived.

He thought about it the whole night (and got way too little sleep because of it) but he didn't have a solution or a plan as he jogged towards the platform the next morning. He was sure he wouldn't win her with presents, with flowers or other romantic stuff. It would also probably not get him any bonus points when he was protective of her. Maybe he could try to be as charming as possible, but when he thought about what he looked like when he smiled, he wasn't sure if that was the best course of action. Too much teeth for human-like creatures.

Well, he had to find out what she liked, first. Which wouldn't be easy at all. But he'd try. He should try to be not too obvious about it, not that he'd chase her away. Fuck, this was going to be really difficult.

On one hand, Huskar had wished for an easy mate, but then that would be boring as hell. This was at least exciting. And to have a strong mate, an independent mate, one who knew what she wanted and was fully capable to fend for herself, was thrilling.

Huskar shortly wondered when he had decided she was his mate. He couldn't be sure. He knew nothing of her, not even her name.

But when he saw her, waiting by the platform, he couldn't supress a smile. She was beautiful, even though or maybe because she looked absolutely deadly. Her form was a little blurred, making it hard to get a sense of where her body began and ended, which was okay as long as she stood still. As soon as she moved, there only remained a patch of black, dark green, grey and dark blue.

She held a weapon, a strange-looking thing with a handle and blades on both sides, in her right hand, leaving the other free to throw one of the daggers strapped to her waist. Huskar supposed she seldom sheathed her weapon.

She waited until Huskar was closer, then she nodded as greeting and stepped onto the platform. She didn't speak, not now and not when they were ported into the safe zone of the town war. She fully concentrated on herself, but when she was finished with buying stuff and Huskar wasn't, she waited at the entrance of the safe zone. So she was aware of him, she just didn't show it.

It took Huskar some time to get used to the fighting style of the Phantom Assassin. She went back and forth a lot and sometimes didn't even react when an enemy hit her. It took also some time to get used to the constant blur to her shape, even though it wasn't as bad for her allies as it was for her enemies (a construct of the town wars).

The Assassin didn't comment on anything the troll did. Neither good nor bad. She didn't say what she expected of him, which didn't make it any easier for him to do the right things at the right time.

After a while he thought he could more feel than see a change in her expression, in her eyes, whether she liked what he had done or not. He detected it the first time he did something really stupid. Even he cringed afterwards and when he looked at the Assassin he could feel her disdain about the action. Not that her expression had actually changed, she appeared to be as emotionless as sever. But he was sure he saw something.

Since Huskar didn't want to stare at the Phantom Assassin the whole time like an idiot, he wasn't sure what made him think he had sensed a difference in her attitude towards him. Until he died the first time.

Frowning as he appeared in the safe zone of their town, he bought a scroll of teleport and used it to get back to their tower. This time the look the Assassin sent his way was so full of disappointment and disdain it was unmistakable. And she was able to get it across without changing her expression.


	4. Chapter 3

Huskar prowled up and down in front of the enemy lines, far enough away to be out of danger. Which meant too far away to hit anyone. He was strong but even he couldn't go in there alone. An ally joined him and stared at the attacking enemy. He was obviously as reluctant to charge into the fray as Huskar was.

The clash of weapons against armour and against the walls of the buildings was loud, the enemy lines a mass of movement and colours.

There was the tiniest shift in the air announcing the arrival of the Phantom Assassin. Before the Sacred Warrior could turn around a pair of daggers flew past him, followed by a blur of dark that rushed towards the centre of the battle. She was fast and before he could process what was happening, half of the enemy creatures were dead, some were stunned and some were already fleeing. Only one actually tried to counter the attack.

Huskar stared with wide eyes, frozen into place by disbelief. She was alone, against all of them, and the fight was over within seconds. With her being the winner! She wasn't even wounded and she began to chase after the ones that had fled.

She was magnificent, her style of fighting was amazing, her movements precise, every strike hit its mark and all the while she was still able to evade the incoming attacks.

Never had he seen anything like that, not even close. She didn't need him, she didn't need anyone, she was competent and strong and fast. And beautiful in her deadly focus.

Huskar had always preferred strong women, but this was exceptional. No creature he knew was remotely like the Assassin.

There was no way the Sacred Warrior could ever win any fair fight against her. And since she, as an Assassin, was probably the master of unfair fighting, he wouldn't win one of those, either. He had debated if he should continue his search for why the Veiled Sisters didn't have soulmates and let it come to a fight between him and the Phantom Assassin. But seeing this he wouldn't stand a chance.

It would be the stupidest thing he'd ever done and he'd probably be dead before he ever realized what was happening. If she truly was his soulmate, he had to get to her without going against her threat. Because she had said she'd kill him and he was absolutely sure she'd stay true to her words. She'd kill her soulmate. Maybe she'd hesitate, but hesitation from her would change nothing about the outcome. He'd be dead just the same.

Winning the war didn't take them long after this fight. Before it had been a struggle but the moment the Phantom Assassin had truly joined the fighting, it was all over. Huskar almost felt inferior, unimportant. He wondered if they could all just leave and let her do the work alone. Maybe she'd be able to, without them. But then he simply stood back a bit and watched her.

The twinge he had felt in his gut when he had realized how much more skilled the Phantom Assassin was vanished when he saw her going through the enemy lines as if it was nothing. As if it was the easiest thing in the world. He was in awe.

"You were not much help." The Phantom Assassin appeared by his side as Huskar was standing next to the destroyed buildings of the enemy town. It was over, they had razed everything to the ground.

"You didn't need my help." The war had gotten him nothing, Huskar thought. He had hoped he could form a bond with the Assassin, could get to know her or something. But it wasn't the case. She stood by his side the same way she had at the beginning: with too much space between them and without acknowledging his existence. She had talked to him but she hadn't looked at him. It was the same way she treated everyone around her. With absolute indifference.

Huskar wouldn't give up that easily, he'd simply ask her on another town war. But he wasn't sure it would lead to anything. The Phantom Assassin was perfect in her occupation. To think, even for a moment, she'd give up on her sisters and whatever was part of her being an Assassin for a soulmate was more than stupid. They erased their soulmate marks for a reason, probably willingly. To think he could make her see him and have him as her soulmate despite it all? Stupid.

Nonetheless he felt the pull towards her. He wanted to be near her, with her, wanted to get to know her. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to resist this pull. But if he didn't and she remained this aloof, it might destroy him. With her as his soulmate, he'd fall in love with her sooner or later. To be this close to her and at the same time this far away would be hell. It was mildly uncomfortable already and they had barely spent time together. He didn't know yet if they were truly soulmates.

It would be better to walk away now, to leave and never look back. He'd be without a soulmate but he wouldn't be condemned to a hell where he was near but not near enough.

Either he was a masochist or it was already too late. When they appeared on the platform from which they had started, he grinned at her. "You want to get a drink? Like, celebrate the win."

At least this got her to look at him. Without expression, but anything was better than the indifference.

"I don't drink."

Of course she didn't. "I didn't mean alcohol in principle, but anything at all. You can't tell me you are not thirsty after a war. And hungry." It was normal to feel things like that stronger after a war because during one the body didn't need food or drink or rest. It was a little as if it all came back at once after the war was over and Huskar could usually eat a whole raptor then.

Her expression was unreadable. It had to be something the Veiled Sisters learned, just like they learned to throw a dagger with deadly precision.

"Okay."

Huskar stared. He had hoped for it but he hadn't actually thought she'd say yes. It felt like a déjà-vu but the grin wouldn't come like it had the last time. She had agreed to accompany him but it didn't feel like a victory. It felt like he continued on his way to certain doom.

There was a flicker in her eyes, just the tiniest bit. Huskar didn't know why. With a normal creature he'd have said she was disappointed that he didn't show joy at her answer but with her that couldn't possibly be it.

The way to the inn near the platform was a march of about an hour. They didn't talk at all while they walked. The Phantom Assassin didn't do small talk (or talk at all) and Huskar was lost in thoughts. He had this inner conflict, the desire to be near his soulmate fighting against the knowledge that it would be hell, that he'd suffer for the rest of his life.

Though she had agreed to get a drink with him, though she had fought with him, it wouldn't continue. She'd head back to her job and he'd head back home, alone. Forever without a mate.

Huskar growled under his breath. He had heard that it made creatures sentimental when they found their mate but this was crazy. He had wanted to find the one destined to be by his side, but he had never yearned for it the way he did now. Just thinking about being all alone in his house was almost like physical pain. It hurt.

At first he hadn't been sure if the Assassin was his mate, but somewhere along the uncertainty of it had vanished. He felt it, with every fibre of his being. This was the one creature, this was his soulmate. She could hide her mark as much as she wanted, it didn't matter.

The drink wasn't as nice as Huskar would've liked. The Assassin still didn't talk and he was too hungry to do much except eating. When he was finished with that and looked up at the female across the table, she was as always. No emotion visible on her features, nothing. She had eaten something as well, though not as much as Huskar. At least not when he compared the two piles of plates. He wasn't sure what to say to her, so he just downed his drink. A good delaying tactic, but he still didn't know what to say when he was finished with that.

The Phantom Assassin stared at him, not even trying to make this easier. "That's what you intended when you invited me for a drink? To sit there and stare at the table top?" She stood up. "I have to get going. Thank you for the town war."

Before he could reply, she had vanished. Not gone, she wasn't that fast, but she had blurred into the shadows, becoming nearly invisible. Huskar felt her presence for a few moments longer. Then he was alone. He sighed. What a wretched day.

As he had predicted, being alone at home was awful. He wondered if he could've made the Assassin stay longer with him at the inn. What she had said, it had sounded as if she had expected more. Huskar had been different than usual, because until now he hadn't thought about what it would mean for him to have a soulmate he could never reach.

He wouldn't survive it. Not if he got to know her better and maybe even fell in love with her.

The prospect of such misery made him want to punch something, made him want to kill, preferably with much bloodshed, pain and despair. If he could make others suffer more than he did, he would certainly feel better.

The following months would be known as the killing spree of the Sacred Warrior. He killed every creature that got in his way and so much as looked at him. But it didn't help. At least not much. Every night when he lay down to sleep, sadness would wash over him until he felt he couldn't breathe.

It was almost impossible for him to sleep, his dreams image after image of the Assassin. Afterwards it was all worse, his heart hurt more than his body did, which said a lot after weeks of almost no sleep, constant fighting, too little food and too much strain.

This wouldn't do. Huskar couldn't go on like that. But he didn't have an idea what to do instead. So he did the one thing that would at least buy him some time. He went into another town war. There he didn't feel pain, not like in the real world. There he didn't have to sleep. There everything was a mindless war, battle after battle. After the first, he did another and another. Until they all blurred together and he couldn't remember how many wars he had joined.

Between two wars, the Shadow Priest waited for him at one of the platforms. He appeared to be concerned as he addressed Huskar. "What are you doing? I've been informed you are behaving even crazier than usual. Did someone hit you too hard on the head?"

Huskar didn't want to talk to the other troll. He simply snarled at him and joined the next town war, therefore dodging the question. The words didn't show much concern, but the fact the Priest had come all the way to the platform and had probably waited there for who knew how long to talk to him, that hadn't happened before. He didn't care, though.

Then, in the next war, the worst happened. The Phantom Assassin was in the opposite team, was an enemy. Huskar didn't know until the war had been going for quite some time. It was one of the first bigger fights when he saw the distinctive blur at the edge of his vision.

His heart definitely stopped for a few beats and his whole body froze. This was the worst scenario he could've ever pictured. Maybe he had hoped to meet her again in a war, but not like that. Not as his enemy.

Because no matter what might happen, he could never hurt her. Not even when he knew that she was stronger and could dodge his spear. He just couldn't. Too absorbed in his thoughts, Huskar didn't even realize that his allies died one after the other. Only when he was hit square in the chest by some weapon did he come to his senses. By then it was too late. He didn't see the Assassin as he died.

Not sure what to do now, Huskar lurked around in the safe zone. His allies didn't take this very well and so he was on the run again not much after. But he was reluctant to engage in battles. Though he didn't see the Phantom Assassin again. It was as if she had vanished. Just like in real life, Huskar thought bitterly.

The enemy team was always only engaging as four, not the usual five. They were strong enough without the Assassin, because Huskar was afraid to fight. He wished she didn't take part in the fights because she was as reluctant to hurt him as he was to hurt her, but that couldn't be true. It was more likely that she farmed or pushed or did something that benefited her team more.

Huskar lost this town war, and afterwards he sat on one of the stones near the platform. His spear lay on the ground next to his feet and he buried his face in his hands. He had never felt this lost and alone in his whole life and it was going to destroy him.

Seeing the Assassin had brought everything back, the desperation and the hopelessness of his situation. A Veiled Sister who hid the mark of her mate.

There was no place in the world he could go to that would make him get over it. He had tried the town wars, but it didn't do, either. He could as well run into her there, as he had just found out.

Someone sat down on the stone next to Huskar. He didn't hear anything, he simply felt the presence of another creature. And he knew immediately who it was, without having to look. "Go away." He couldn't comprehend why she'd be here. He didn't think she took pleasure in the suffering of others but she didn't leave.

"What do you want?" He growled the words at her as he raised his head from his hands. She was as calm as ever, her face showing nothing at all.

"I never wanted to hurt you." Her voice was as devoid of feelings as her expression but her eyes, they flickered for a split second.

Huskar didn't care. Her sympathy gained him nothing, and it surely didn't make his pain vanish. He snarled at her even though he already knew she wouldn't react to it. "Oh come on, don't take yourself so seriously."

A flicker in her eyes again, about which Huskar still didn't care.

"This isn't about me?" Still calm, but there was a hint of something. Maybe uncertainty?

"Of course it isn't." Huskar would never admit to it, not as long as the female hid the mating mark. There was no use and he didn't want her pity or whatever this was going to be. "You are just some creature I fought a town war with. Nothing special there. Now go away, I want to join another war, preferably without you because you seem to be annoying today." He grabbed his spear and stepped into the middle of the platform. He felt her eyes on him but she didn't move and he didn't look back.

In the safe zone of the next town war he slumped, holding himself up on his spear. He shuddered and took a few deep breaths to clear his mind. At least here the pain was dulled, even the pain in his heart.

The encounter had been strange, but he tried to push it from his thoughts. It wasn't easy and he was noticeably absent-minded during the war. The female was really going to drive him crazy.

Huskar wondered what her intention had been, why she had talked to him, why she had approached him. He also wondered what she knew about his actions the last months. It had seemed as if she had more information than one town war against him to base her statement upon.

With a groan he tried to focus on the fight in front of him. She was in his head again, all the time again. No matter what he did and where he went.

It had been stupid, to be so proud and send her away like that. Maybe she would've stayed and he could've spent some time with her.

He groaned again. He had been there and he had decided that the pain afterwards wasn't worth it.

Fighting one town war after the other was more an automatism than anything else. He finished one and just remained on the platform where he appeared afterwards, starting the next one within a few moments. He didn't stop, he didn't think about it, he didn't rest once. He never left the platform.

The town wars were not designed to spend eternity fighting war after war. A creature had to stop at one point. In the wars, one was apart from the real world and sooner or later this would take its toll on the body. As Huskar found out the hard way.

He had just gotten back from a war they had won and though he wasn't happy, he was mildly relaxed. He waited for the next war, when he was hit by a wave of pain. It was so strong, he lost the grip on his spear and fell to the ground. At first he was able to hold himself on hands and knees, but the pain only got worse, until even that was too much.

It was hunger and thirst in a way he had never felt before, combined with utter exhaustion. He curled into a ball in the dirt of the platform, shuddering and groaning. He couldn't move, couldn't even form a coherent thought. It seemed the real world had just taken him back and since he had taken part in so many wars, the hunger he usually felt after a few was ten times worse. But he couldn't get up to do something about it. Instead the pain grew worse, until the mighty Huskar, the Sacred Warrior, passed out from it.

This could as well have been the end of him, considering that his body was completely drained.


	5. Chapter 4

When he woke up, Huskar wasn't sure what had happened. He held his eyes closed for a few moments, trying to remember. There was pain, and nothing else.

Around him it was quiet. Eerily quiet. Not a single sound reached his ears. The air was cool and just a tiny bit moist. As if he was in a stone building with thick walls. Or a cave, somewhere where it was generally colder outside. Nothing like his homeland, then. Neither stone buildings nor cold climate.

That made no sense, but since he didn't remember anything after he had (how embarrassing) passed out, anything could have happened to him. Someone could've kidnapped him. Or taken him as revenge for one of the thousand things he had done.

Since he felt good, at least his body did, he couldn't imagine that this was some kind of revenge. He couldn't imagine any other reason, though. Why should someone take him and help him, just like that? Especially someone who wasn't a troll like him.

He opened his eyes, but that didn't give him any clues as to where he was and why. The room was tiny, not much larger than the bed he was lying on. The walls were built from huge stones, most of them grey with a few lighter ones mixed in between without recognisable pattern. A board was fastened to the wall on the foot-end of the bed. It held one book, a bowl which might contain something to drink, and a lamp. It was the light source of the room, giving off a soft yellow glow. Otherwise the room was empty. Not that there would've been any space to put things.

The door was at his head, so Huskar could directly look at it. It was made of wood, and it appeared to be rather sturdy. There was nothing more to see and he felt well enough to try and sit up. Everything fine so far. Not pain, not even soreness or anything.

While taking stock of his body, Huskar realized that he was almost naked. Someone had taken his armour off. And he had been so thoroughly knocked out that he hadn't woken during the process. Before he could get angry at whoever had taken his stuff, he saw it lying on the floor next to the door in the corner. Even his spear was there.

Definitely no kidnapping of any kind then. No one would be so stupid to give him his armour and weapon when they wanted to hold him hostage or wanted to hurt him. Not even the strongest of creatures.

Slowly, with rising curiosity, he swung his legs from the bed. The floor was cold beneath his feet, colder than he was used to from his home. It didn't bother him, though. There was still no pain, so he got up and put his armour on. No matter what he might think about this situation, he wouldn't go anywhere unarmed. He'd take no chances.

The door wasn't locked and swung open soundlessly. The corridor behind was as empty and as quiet as the room at his back. Nothing here gave the impression that the building was inhabited by any kind of creature.

That didn't change as Huskar walked down the first corridor or the second. What changed was the sense that he was being watched. He didn't detect anything, no movement, no smell, no sound. It was just a feeling of eyes on him. It didn't make him nervous, just careful as he moved on.

Whoever had taken him to this place would surely show themself sometime.

A shadow at the corner of his eyes mad him stop and turn. The corridor he was walking through was wider than the room he had woken in and he was sure someone or something had just slipped past him. There was nothing.

Just the dark walls. But he had seen such a shadow before. And he knew where he was. Just as he knew who was watching him. It were several whos probably.

He was in the domicile of the Veiled Sisters. The realization stunned him for a moment. There were too many implications following this thought. It was so strange that he almost discarded the thought again.

Before he could decide what this meant, someone entered the corridor at the direction he had been walking in. It was no other than the Phantom Assassin. She must've known that he was there, which was no surprise since he had been under observation since he had left the room he had woken in.

She didn't react, merely stared at him before she motioned for him to follow her. Not having any real other option, he did just that.

They entered a room and she shut the door behind him. The sense of being watched faded.

The room was as empty as the whole building seemed to be. The only difference to his room was that this one was big enough to include a desk with one chair in addition to the bed.

The Assassin flipped the chair around so the backrest was against the desk. She sat down, which left only the bed for Huskar, if he didn't want to remain standing.

His heart beat heavy in his chest as he watched the Assassin. She was beautiful as always but being here in her home made her appear more relaxed than usual. She didn't wear her full armour and she didn't give the impression of anticipating an attack every moment. Her expression revealed absolutely nothing of what was about to come next. At least that was as always.

"I would advise you not to go strolling through the rooms here. Right now you have seen little enough that I can bring you home. Or back to the platform, whatever you prefer."

Of course she didn't explain anything about the why of this situation. "Have you brought me here?"

"Yes." Huskar wanted to roll his eyes at this short answer. Couldn't she tell him anything without him having to pry it out of her?

"Why?"

She was silent for a long time, until Huskar thought she wouldn't answer. Her eyes were strangely distant when she finally did.

"I felt you. That you were in pain. So I located you and ported. I found you, unconscious on the platform. Our healer here patched you up. He said you should take breaks between the town wars or this will happen again. I won't rescue you a second time from your own stupidity."

The only thing Huskar could do was stare. Not because she had saved him. But because this was her admitting they were bound somehow. She had felt that he had been in pain. She had to know what this admission meant, which was probably why she had hesitated.

She didn't add anything else. Huskar felt as if this situation wasn't real. He couldn't fathom why she'd admit something like that, right after she had offered to bring him away from this place. Suddenly his heart was heavy, because it could only mean that she didn't care. She knew they were mates, had to know it since she had seen Huskar's mark often enough. Still she wouldn't say it, wouldn't stay with him.

He didn't know if it made everything worse. He was a little relieved that his own feelings had been real, that he hadn't imagined the pain and the despair. In the end it meant nothing. If she didn't want to be with him, he couldn't change it.

"Thank you. Back to the platform would be nice." There was nothing else left to say. He stood up and gripped his spear tighter. The pain in his heart had been gone for a few moments, being here with her soothing him in a strange way. Now that it was back it seemed to be worse. His throat burned and his eyes stung. This wouldn't get any better. Every time he saw the Assassin it hurt anew. Every time it hurt more. He couldn't think straight, he just wanted to leave.

The Phantom Assassin hesitated. It was barely discernible, but it was definitely there. Huskar grit his teeth. He needed to get away from her, as fast as possible. The problem with it was, though, that she obviously needed to touch him to get him away. She reached out towards him, her fingers brushing his upper arm. He hardly felt it, but simply the knowledge of her hand on his body made his head spin. He could barely breath, this being the first time they touched.

He wanted so much to lean against her hand, to increase the contact. Then he wanted to lean away from it, to make it stop, because it would only bring him more pain. Ever more.

The teleportation took too long, it should be over way quicker than it actually lasted. As soon as Huskar had the sand from the platform underneath his feet, he stepped away from the Assassin. Her hand hung in the air for a moment, before she lowered it to her side.

She should've immediately left again, but when she didn't, Huskar stared at her with a frown. "What?" He sounded absolutely rude. He didn't care.

"I'm sorry." When he would've growled another impolite thing at her, she raised her hand. "Wait. Yes, you are right, I am your mate. But as I said the first time we met, I am a Veiled Sister. We don't have mates. I can't change that, even if I wanted to. I can only hope that the passage of time will make it easier." Her eyes flickered, as if she actually felt something and wasn't as emotionally dead as her features suggested. "Please, refrain from getting yourself this close to death a second time." She hesitated. "I'm sorry." Then she left. And with it came the pain.

For a moment Huskar wondered if she felt it, too, this pain. It had to be, with them being mates. Except, she'd said she didn't have a mate. It didn't seem possible, but there was seldom something not possible in their world.

Mate. He had been right. Not that this knowledge gained him anything. It changed nothing, either. He could still do nothing, he was stuck. In a way, it was even worse now, because there was no chance for him to be wrong. He would forever be without a mate, forever alone. He would forever feel this pain. It was possible that it would lessen over time, though considering the amount of town wars he had been in and that it hadn't gotten any better during this time, he didn't hold much hope.

It would be sensible to find a solution for this problem, but Huskar was frustrated. And angry. At the Phantom Assassin and at the world for doing this to him. He wanted to get as far away as fast as possible. He wanted the pain to stop. He wanted to kill, to scream, to bring fear and destruction. A town war was available.

He lost the war. But at least it had given him time to think and to calm down. Fighting in the wars all the time would get him killed eventually. No creature could do this forever. As he himself had learned. He was tough and it was almost impossible to kill him. Nonetheless the wars had nearly achieved it.

Outrunning the pain was no option, then. Not like this at least. Thinking was easier with something to drink, so Huskar made his way over to the inn. He took a small and empty table and ordered something with a lot of alcohol. The beer from the dwarves was the strongest drink the inn had, the liquid rather bitter and dark brown. Huskar didn't care. Drinks from the trolls didn't taste any better.

The inn was astonishingly quiet, only a few creatures present. Probably because of the hour. It was too early in the morning, even the waitress looked a little sleepy.

Huskar downed half of the beer before he leaned back and closed his eyes. The situation was crazy. He had found his mate, but she refused to be his mate. That couldn't be new. Not the reason for the refusal, but the fact itself. There had to be others who had to live with the pain of forever being alone. Of knowing who would complete their soul but never being able to have it.

There had to be a way to get rid of this constant pain and someone had to know it. It was only a matter of finding this someone.

He would try his luck with the Shadow Priest first. He loathed the troll shaman on a fundamental level, but he knew a lot of creatures and he was a shaman. He'd visit him tomorrow and tell him about his mate refusing him. Nothing more. It didn't matter anyway, what his mate was or why she refused him. He didn't want advice in how to get her, either. First, he didn't think he could, and second, he didn't think he should. If she wanted him as mate, she could decide that without him having to pressure her into wanting it. He wasn't an arse.

He just wanted to get back to his life, to not being in pain all the time.

He ordered another beer. It was probably not very wise to do so, the alcohol already blurring his vision and making him reach for his second drink rather unsteadily. Not that he cared very much, though. He'd simply take a room and let one of the bouncers carry him up there when he was too drunk to stand.

A sound plan. The last thing Huskar could remember was him paying for the room in advance, as well as the two drinks before he had finished the second one even half. Next he woke up in a small room, on a hard but clean bed. His head hurt only a little, and his body felt heavy and relaxed. He rolled from the bed, intending to get on his feet that way.

His face hit the floor first, which was a feat in itself. With a grunt, he tried to get his limbs to function as he wanted. That took him quite some time, but he was able to sit up and lean back at the bed. He stared down at his feet with a frown. Damn dwarf beer.

A knock on the door made his frown deepen. "What?" His voice was rough and scratchy but the door opened without pause. A small satyr stood on the threshold.

"You ordered breakfast for the morning." The creature looked at Huskar, propped against the bed and probably looking like he wasn't able to get up. Which he wasn't. Yet, he hoped. It raised its eyebrows. "You are the Sacred Warrior, right?"

"Yes."

A flick of a hand, almost dismissive, definitely not polite. "Breakfast is ready downstairs." The satyr was gone a second later.

Considering his state of body at the moment, Huskar decided not to get up yet. He didn't even try, well aware how futile it would be. He lay down again, on the floor since he didn't get his body to obey enough to get back into bed, and tried to sleep some more. Breakfast could wait.

After a few more hours, it was better. No headache and when he tried to get up, he was actually able to get to his feet. A little wobbly, but good enough.

Breakfast.

Not sure what to do with his day afterwards, Huskar ported home. He debated about doing some more town wars, but he was afraid he'd get stuck in them like before and he really didn't want to get knocked out like he had been a second time. It had definitely not been pleasant and he was sure that the Assassin wouldn't rescue him again. If he were more suicidal, he'd consider that she had lied and that she'd always save him, but then he didn't want to take that chance.

At least the anger and frustration at the Phantom Assassin as well as the world in general had almost vanished. What remained was sadness and the pain in his heart. And his thoughts constantly circling around the Assassin. The most frustrating thing was that he couldn't do anything at all. He was helpless, stuck in this fucked up situation.

In his house, he took a deep breath. The air smelled of dust and wood. It made him feel at home, though the dust wasn't usually there.

When he had last been here, the Assassin had been as well. She had threatened him, while she had been absolutely calm, her face expressionless. She had known that he was her mate, back then. She had known it and still had said she'd kill him. Even after all this time, he was sure that she would have gone through with it. She'd probably still do it now.

A strange and very lonely concept, to be forever without a mate and even to consider killing one's mate for whatever reason. Huskar wondered if they had a choice in the matter or what would happen if one of the Veiled Sisters didn't want to live by this rule. Would they be banned? Or maybe killed together with their mate?

That was definitely possible, with what he knew from them. He grimaced. What a luck he had, to have a mate who didn't want or wasn't allowed to be tied to anyone.

Exhausted from everything that had happened since he had left his house, Huskar fell onto the bed. He stared at the ceiling for a long time, thoughts drifting. He wished the Assassin was here with him. He couldn't really imagine how she'd be as a mate, but that didn't matter. He just wanted her to be around. He thought he could be happy just to watch her fight every day, to have her sit on his floor and clean her weapons, or train in front of his house.

His imagination was so lively, for a moment he thought the Phantom Assassin was actually in the house. He sighed and closed his eyes. He knew it wasn't true, that it was just his mind playing tricks on his senses. But he enjoyed the trick for as long as his head was willing to keep it up. And he was able to fall asleep before it ended.

In his dreams she was present as well so when he woke up, he buried deeper into his pillow to maybe fall back asleep and have the dream continue. He didn't.

Frowning, he stood up and, following the growling of his stomach, raided his kitchen for something eatable that hadn't gotten bad during his absence. He found enough at least for this meal. He'd go hunting later. After he had visited the Shadow Priest. He was reluctant to go to him for help, because he didn't like him. The shaman had a way to do his job that was creepy at best. Shaman stuff was always strange, but what he did was the worst Huskar had ever seen from any troll he had met. It was all highlighted by the appearance of the Shadow Priest. Too much paint on his face, too much grinning and too much stuff tied to his staff and his belt that had been living once.

Still, the Shadow Priest was the best shaman known in the troll world and Huskar wanted the best for his problem. He didn't want to walk around and tell his story every shaman he could find. So the Shadow Priest it was.


	6. Chapter 5

The walk to the shaman's place was long, including two nights underneath the clear sky. Huskar could get there faster but it always calmed him to walk over the plains. He caught a small creature on the first day, which he could eat throughout his walk. He even found a few berries to add. All in all, it was peaceful and wouldn't there be the craving for his mate, it would be perfect.

Huskar was on his feet early, since he didn't sleep very well. His mind wouldn't do this trick again, where it made Huskar think the Assassin was there and so he was cranky, lonely and in constant pain. The sun rose behind the hills when the home from the Shadow Priest came into view.

It was a rather small hut in which the shaman lived and where only a few creatures were permitted to enter. A second hut, not the least bigger, was for guests. There was space between the huts for whatever shamans did all day when they were outside.

Since the shaman would still be sleeping this early in the morning, Huskar went to hunt something for breakfast. Then he sat down by the guesthouse, ate and drank water from one of the barrels standing nearby. Then he waited.

Only when it was around midday did he get up to knock on the door. It was still possible that the Shadow Priest wasn't at home and he didn't want to sit around waiting for nothing.

He knocked a second time and was rewarded with the shuffling of feet on the other side of the door. A moment passed without any sound before the door was opened and a definitely sleepy Shadow Priest blinked up at the Sacred Warrior. He yawned without covering his mouth, which looked unbelievably creepy with the smudged painted on teeth around the shaman's mouth.

"What want?" The shaman mumbled while he squinted against the light outside of the hut.

"Good day Shadow Priest." Better to be formal when he wanted something. "I come with a question to you, since you are the most accomplished shaman of all trolls."

"Wha?" With a shake of his head he moved back a little and closed the door. "Gimme an hour." The door shut in Huskar's face.

That had been foreseeable.

About two hours later, the door opened again and a grinning Shadow Priest stepped out. He had his staff in hand and the paint on his face was fresh. "Sacred Warrior, pleasure to find you in my front garden!"

Huskar blinked and pointedly looked at the flat earth around him that was anything but a front garden. The shaman ignored the look and sauntered over "To what do I deserve the pleasure of your visit?" He sat down, lay the staff next to him on the ground and pulled two cups from his belt as well as a flask. He poured and held one cup out for Huskar. Knowing that it was never wise to eat or drink anything the shaman gave someone, he grabbed the cup but didn't even sip from it. He sat down, though, and since he had been asked this directly, told about his problem. A mate who refused to be his mate and the pain that wouldn't go away, no matter how much he wanted it to.

The Shadow Priest's eyes were unfocused. He stared at a point behind Huskar, which made the Warrior almost fidget. It was unnerving. After long minutes of silence, the shaman shook his head. "I can't offer you what you seek. I can offer you something to dull the pain, though. I'm not sure you'll like the side effects of it. But there is no way to forget one's mate or to erase the connection." He leaned forward, his gaze sharp. "Your mate feels the same pain as you do. This concept isn't designed to go against. You are mates, you belong together. Whatever the reasons are to not want it, you'll only be able to not be together while being in pain."

That wasn't what Huskar had hoped he'd get, since 'dulling the pain' probably meant some sort of drug. Especially when the shaman mentioned 'side effects'. He thought about it, wondering if maybe the shaman just didn't know of a way to erase the connection. He could roam the world and try to find someone else, someone with more knowledge. But while he'd do that, he'd still miss his mate so much it hurt. He could at least try the drug and see how it affected him. He could still stop taking it then. And with the pain dulled, he could probably better search for a different solution.

Not happy with the outcome of this visit, the Sacred Warrior nodded. "I'll try it."

With a snort and a crazy laugh, the Shadow Priest stood up. "You must be really desperate. How glad I am I haven't met my mate yet. Stay here," he said as Huskar made to follow him.

Swaying a little, the shaman vanished in his hut. Huskar used the time to sniff at the liquid in his cup. It smelled of herbs but he didn't know what kind. It didn't smell like anything he was familiar with. He put the cup in front of him without drinking. The shaman was always unsteady on his feet because he took all kinds of drugs. Someone had once said that everything the shaman ate or drank contained drugs. That could be exaggerated. It didn't have to be.

A while later, Huskar was getting really bored, the door of the hut opened again. The Shadow Priest did nothing in a hurry. He was probably incapable of it, since he'd fall over or something if he moved too fast. Since he was never in any way pressed for time so he didn't need to hurry.

He held a small bag in his hands, sniffing at it and then grinning widely. "This, my friend, will help you." He dropped it in Huskar's upturned palm. "I'd advise you to take the tiniest bit, once in the morning and once in the evening. I'll show you how." He took one of the bags from his belt and poured a powder from it in his hand. Then he stuck his tongue out and dipped just the tip of it into it. "Just the tiniest bit." He repeated before he smacked his lips and grinned again. The remaining powder he stowed in the bag. "You'll get dizzy at the beginning but it will go away. You'll be slower, remember that when you are on the hunt. Maybe go hunting in the evening before you take the second dose. But, you won't feel the pain in your heart anymore and that's what you want. When you get used to the substance, you might have to take more of it. Come back to me when it's empty. Good luck!" He turned away.

"Wait!" The shaman looked at Huskar. "What about your payment?"

The grin again, unnerving. "Invite me to the mating ceremony!" He had the door of the hut closed behind him before Huskar could say anything to that.

Sometimes the Shadow Priest was crazy. One could never be sure if he forgot things or if he knew more things than he should. "There won't be a mating ceremony." Huskar muttered while he got up. But at least this was a cheap help. He could've ported home but he began to walk. He held the bag in his hand and thought about what he was about to do. There was no doubt that this was a drug. Something that would make him dizzy and slow. Huskar snarled, but only a little.

Now that he was on the way home, it hit him again, that he'd be alone in his house. If the Assassin were his mate, she'd be there. Or at least she'd show up at some time.

Alone. This time he snarled in earnest, because the thought hurt. That made the decision if he should take the drug easier. He ported home. A shudder raced down his back because for a second he had thought he felt the Phantom Assassin. He took a deep breath and tried to calm down. It wasn't that it was impossible for her to be here, it was just that it was impossible that she was here. It would make no sense. Which meant, his mind was playing tricks again.

With another snarl Huskar poured powder from the bag in his hand and before he could question the wisdom of his actions he dipped his tongue into it. Just the tip, as the Shadow Priest had advised. Then he put the powder away, into a cupboard in the kitchen.

For a moment he debated if he should do something useful, but that was probably a bad idea. He just sat down on a pillow in the living room and waited for the drug to kick in. He didn't have to wait long. First, he recognized the side effects. His vision got a tad blurry, it was as if the world moved around him. Then his thoughts grew hazy but with it came a lightness that was new. It was a bit like he was floating, the pain was almost gone, just a tiny twinge remained, nearly non-existent.

Huskar grinned and lay down on the floor, arms and legs outstretched. He stared at the ceiling and simply enjoyed the state of bliss he was in. Even when his mind conjured the illusion of the Assassin's presence beside him it wasn't painful but kind of soothing. He sighed and closed his eyes. And drifted like that, with an imaginary mate by his side and without pain, without this crazy circle his thoughts had been going around in.

After a while, it wasn't that extreme any more, the effect of the drugs lessening a bit. Huskar was able to get himself together enough to stand up then do some stuff in and around the house. He had to concentrate on what he was doing, and he decided not to take anything sharp into his hands yet. But he was able to tidy up and collect fruit and wood and do some other smaller things.

Taking the advice from the Shadow Priest he went hunting in the late evening. It wasn't as easy as it usually was but it was alright. He wasn't overly happy with the side effects of the drug but to be without pain was such a relief that he didn't consider once not taking it. His mind conjured the feeling of the Phantom Assassin near him randomly throughout the day. He didn't mind it, with the drug it was no bother.

With the drug, Huskar was fine. He slept peacefully, even though he dreamt about his mate. He was able to do everything he had done before he had met the Assassin (though a little slower) and he was happy with it. He was happy without her. He thought about her often but it didn't hurt. He even sometimes smiled when his mind played it's tricks and it felt as if she was there.

When the Shadow Priest visited him a few weeks later, he told him that it worked. He told him about how he felt as if his mate was near him sometimes, but the shaman didn't know if that was normal or not. "Maybe she is there? And you just can't see her?"

That was unlikely, which he told the Shadow Priest. "She'd never come here."

The shaman didn't look convinced but he didn't say anything more. He simply changed the topic.

It was what made Huskar think about it again that night. He hadn't made the drug responsible for this mind tricks. Maybe it was his mind, no matter if he took drugs or not. Or maybe, just maybe, could it be that the Assassin was around sometimes?

Huskar remembered that the Shadow Priest had said his mate would hurt just like him. He had pushed the statement out of his head because he hadn't cared at the time. And he couldn't imagine the Assassin hurting. She probably had some special techniques to get over such a pain. But then, maybe she didn't.

If she didn't, then she'd be in pain all the time as well. The same pain that had made him desperate enough to take drugs from the Shadow Priest. Aside from the fact that she didn't have the drug he had, she'd never take it because it would make her slow.

As unlikely as it seemed that she came to him and was around, just to be near him, Huskar couldn't shrug the doubt off now. He had been too willing to accept that it was his imagination but it didn't have to be. Since he was taking the drugs, he didn't feel the need to be with his mate anymore, not like he was craving it with every fibre of his being. So the fact that it felt as if she was around didn't have to be imagination.

Right at that moment, he felt her presence. Or imagined her presence. He couldn't see her, he already knew that. But even if she was really here he wouldn't be able to see her because she was a master at hiding.

Maybe it was the drugs, but Huskar decided to try something. He pushed his hand down his body, under the blanket that covered him. He was naked underneath, always slept naked. It wasn't that he hadn't jacked off since he had returned home. But first, he was sure he hadn't done it when he had had the feeling the Assassin was near and second, he fully intended to indulge today. No quick thing, he wanted to see what happened if his mate was around and watched him.

It was a little crazy, but he didn't care. And he was sure that normal things, trying to talk to her or trying to find her or something like that wouldn't work. She'd ignore it.

Just the thought about how he could watch her touch herself got him instantly hard. She had to feel something similar when she saw him. And if it was his imagination, if she wasn't around, he'd loose nothing in taking his time to get off.

He threw the blanket off and sighed as the cool air touched his warm skin. He didn't open his eyes, instead he tried to pinpoint the feeling of the Assassin's presence. He couldn't. If she was here, it would be a wonder that he felt her at all. Was probably due to them being mates.

Huskar wrapped his hand around himself and stroked slowly up and down. There was a ripple in the air, almost intangible. If he hadn't been watching for it, he'd have missed it. He smiled and continued the stroking. He made sure to move slowly, deliberately. He cupped his balls. Not that he usually did that but that way the Phantom Assassin could get a good look at him.

When there was another ripple, he sighed. It had to be her, she had to be here. It wasn't his imagination, hadn't been a trick from his mind. She had been here all this time, at least once a day. She wasn't able to be without him, just like he wasn't able to be without her.

Not that this realization changed anything. She could've said something if she had wanted to be his mate. The fact that she hid made it clear that she still refused it.

Another stroke, Huskar growled, and he was sure he almost felt the touch of a hand against his chest. He shuddered. How he wished she'd touch him, her small hand, skin probably rough from the usage of her weapons.

She wasn't allowed to have a mate but couldn't live without him the same he couldn't live without her. It wasn't painful for him because he was drugged all the time, but he still remembered how he had felt. Fuck, he wanted to make her pain go away.

"Touch me." He growled the words, his voice thick because he wanted so much. A hitch in her breath, he could hear it. Huskar still didn't open his eyes, didn't dare. He might scare her away, or he might see nothing and find it all being his imagination.

Then he felt it, the tiniest brush of fingertips against his skin. It was enough to make him sigh and shudder again. She was there and she was touching him.

"More." This time it sounded more like begging. An instant later her palm pressed against his stomach. Huskar growled as his muscles twitched.

The stroking of his hand grew faster. He couldn't slow down anymore, couldn't stop. His mate was there, had her hand against his skin and just this small touch was enough to make him crazy for more. He felt on fire in a way he had never been before. It was amazing.

He came, shuddering and growling, eyes still closed. The Phantom Assassin's breath was harsh but she didn't move, her hand lying lightly on his stomach, the only place their bodies touched.

It didn't stay like that. The hand vanished. Without the drugs Huskar would surely have opened his eyes or sat up. He didn't. He was relaxed, pleased and a little sleepy. The only thing he managed was to sloppily wipe his stomach and a murmured "stay" before he drifted off.


	7. Chapter 6

Of course the Assassin wasn't there the next morning. Huskar didn't know if she had stayed after he had fallen asleep. He thought about how she had touched him and how much she had to hurt and he felt a longing to be there for her, to help her and comfort her. It was stupid, she was such a strong creature, she would never need him but the fact that she came to see him every day spoke volumes. She wanted something she couldn't have.

Huskar hadn't taken the drug yet, but he didn't feel the slightest pain. Instead he thought about a way to help his mate. Until now he hadn't considered how it was for her. He had assumed that it was easy for her, that it was her choice and therefore she didn't suffer, but that wasn't true.

There was nothing he could do. At least nothing to change the situation per se. But the simple fact that she wanted to be near him seemed to be enough to make his heart realise that this was a shitty situation but that it wasn't hopeless. And that he wasn't alone with his pain.

His mind was still constantly occupied with her, but Huskar wasn't as desperate as before. It was as if she was only gone for the day and he knew she'd be back again. As if she had gone to work or something. He could handle that. And being not under the influence of the drugs made him extremely productive that day.

The second he felt the presence of the Phantom Assassin, he stopped what he was doing and stood. He closed his eyes. He needed his other senses, sight gained him nothing. He wasn't very confident about what he should do, he had to do something, though.

"Can I help somehow?" Huskar thought she was behind him, but he didn't turn. He didn't get an answer. "I... you can come here whenever you want." He hesitated, but then he just went with what was on his mind. "And if you want to touch, or if you want to sleep next to me, or whatever, I don't mind. If you want, I can cook for you, too, so you can eat with me. I can make you a separate bed if you'd prefer that. I don't know, you can just tell me." He stopped, not sure if he should continue or not. He was sure the Assassin hadn't moved, but she didn't respond.

With a sigh he went to continue with stapling fire wood. He had suspected that talking to her wouldn't work, still he was disappointed.

"How do you know I'm here?" There was no hint of emotion in her voice. It was expressionless as always. But Huskar was unbelievably relieved, to hear her, to get a reaction at last!

"I can feel you. At first I thought it was my imagination, but it never was. It was always you." He turned around, had to find out if she had stopped hiding now that she knew it was useless.

His breath caught. She stood there, in front of his house, confident as always. She looked the same as when he had last seen her, nothing changed. Huskar smiled. She was beautiful and deadly, slightly blurred to his vision. Everyone could see how deadly she was, it was in the way she held her body, always in control. His stomach did a somersault and his heart definitely missed a beat. He wanted so much to walk closer and hug her, he wondered how she stood it to watch him all the time and never touch. He'd have gone crazy by now. But except for an involuntary twitch of his hand, he didn't move.

Glad that she was here, he took her in. She was awesome. And she hid her pain so very well, he'd have never guessed she felt anything at all. Only her presence here showed that she in fact felt something.

She didn't move, didn't say anything, just stood there and watched him like he watched her. She'd never make the first step. Maybe she was too proud or she didn't want to break the rules from the Veiled Sisters. But if she hurt the same Huskar had, she'd not survive this. Not for how long their lives were. Huskar stepped forward. The Assassin kept watching him. He stopped when he was close enough to be able to touch her, if he reached out. She still didn't move. Nothing in her expression changed.

But she hadn't backed away, either. Huskar took a chance. He held her gaze and reached out with one hand. Slowly, he brushed the tips of his fingers against her cheek. She had seen what he was going to do and still she hadn't moved. She didn't react to his fingertips but when he cupped her cheek in his palm, the tiniest sigh escaped her. Her eyelids fluttered but she didn't close them. She still held his gaze.

Huskar's heart hammered in his chest. He was unbelievably nervous but the fact that she didn't shy away was enough to make him keep going. Not too much, not too fast, just a little bit more. He moved his hand along her cheek until his fingers touched the hair at her nape. He stroked over her cheek with his thumb, taking it all in. Her soft skin, how warm she was against the tips of his fingers, how he could feel her muscles, even when he was barely brushing against the part were neck met shoulder. Her eyes were not expressionless. There was a hunger, the desire for more, he was sure of it. But when he stepped closer, the Assassin shut off.

She was out of his reach before he could as much as blink. She looked at him for a moment longer, then she was gone.

Taking a deep breath, to calm down, Huskar shook his head. But it was enough, for now. A grin spread across his face. He had touched his mate. And she had let him. When they moved with this speed it would take forever for them to be together, but that didn't matter. They had time, if nothing else. At least now there was hope. Something that hadn't been there before.

Even when the Phantom Assassin didn't show up the next day Huskar was fine. He was sure there was a reason, some job or something, and that she'd come over again. He was right.

She didn't try to hide her presence, she simply appeared in his living room while he was sharpening his blade after he had been hunting.

Huskar grinned and pushed a second whetstone in her direction. "Hello there. You want to join me?"

When he got no immediate reaction, he simply shrugged and continued. After a few minutes, she sat across from him on the floor and took the stone. She had way more blades, two swords and two hands full of daggers, but this wasn't supposed to be to get a chore done. Not anymore at least. Now, with her sitting there, it was a way for them to spent time together, while she could become comfortable with him and everything. She was still too tense, though Huskar didn't know if it was because of him or because of this fucked-up situation.

Sharpening blades was a legit way to relax, no matter what the reason was. And for his heart and his soul and his longing to be near his mate, it was fine like that. Maybe, if he was lucky, she'd let him touch her again. Just a little, like the last time.

All this anger and pain and now he was completely content and satisfied just to have her here, in his house, sitting across from him. Not even talking, only being there. Maybe he had needed everything that had led to this because he wasn't sure he would've been satisfied with this at the beginning, when he had realized they were mates. Now that he knew how bad it could be, this was fucking amazing.

The Phantom Assassin switched from one blade to the other while Huskar stayed with his single one, which had already been sharp enough when the Assassin hat sat down across from him. But no way was he going to disturb this. And if nothing was left of the steel in his hands he still wouldn't care. Even he could see how she lingered longer on every one of her blades than she actually had to. Definitely playing for time.

When she stood up, Huskar rose as well. "I have to go." She didn't directly vanish, instead she stared at him, as if she was waiting for him to say or do something. This was crazy and really, Huskar didn't know what to say or do. It wouldn't change anything if he told her he didn't want her to leave. And if he hugged her it was maybe too much.

But then she stepped forward and reached out, stroking her fingers against his cheek, similar to the way he had touched her the last time. Huskar's breath caught. It was just the faintest brush against his skin but it was amazing, simply to have her this close and to initiate this. Finally, he thought. It had been worth it. Everything would be worth to have another moment like this.

Her eyes were pale, her skin flawless except for a trace of freckles and he was sure he saw emotions flickering across her features. He couldn't define them, but it was more than he had ever seen. It was because of him. He would've liked to touch her, to kiss her, to feel her, but he was afraid to do something wrong. He wanted desperately for her to come back, every day, he wouldn't survive if he destroyed this now because he couldn't control himself.

Another stroke, soft but sure, no hesitation or uncertainty in her touch. She always seemed to be so confident, while Huskar felt like a mess. He was paralyzed by the emotional battle between want and indecision.

Before he was able to come to a choice about what he wanted to do, she dropped her hand and stepped away from him. And then she was gone.

Huskar closed his eyes and took a deep breath. She had touched him. She had initiated it. Huskar grabbed his weapon and left the house. He felt light, happy. He was going on the hunt. Not to kill, but to run and chase, to give the energy that suddenly coursed through his body an outlet. He felt almost giddy. He! Unbelievable. But he didn't care. His mate had been there and she was so beautiful and strong. He admired her.

The following days were like that. The Phantom Assassin showed up during the day. She never said anything but she always joined Huskar in what he was doing. Even when he was reading a book she sat down on one of the cushions on the floor, took a book and did the same. It was soothing to have her behave this normal, as if there had never been a problem.

There was still a distance between them that Huskar was afraid to break. She always touched him before she left, longer and longer every day.

One day Huskar began to talk to her. He was preparing fruit to dry and he felt like talking. So he told her about how he had learned to dry fruit. He told her about his mother, who had taught him and his tribe, how they had had whole days for collecting fruit and preparing it. He talked and talked and when he looked up once, he found the Assassin sprawled on a cushion in his living room, visibly relaxed and the tiniest smile tugging at her lips.

He stilled and stared. His mind went completely blank and his stomach did crazy things. It was the most natural he had ever seen her and it did things with his heart that he would've never believed possible.

"I like your story. Keep going." The Phantom Assassin didn't change her position and even her smile stayed. Until he kept staring. Then her expression went blank as always and she straightened. "What?"

Huskar could've kicked himself. "You are beautiful." He cringed. That hadn't been what he had wanted to say at all. "I mean..." before he could think about what he had wanted to say, the Assassin relaxed again. She seemed to be a bit wary, but at least she took her former almost lying position on the cushion.

"Thank you." She sounded as if she was a little perplexed by his words.

Fascinated and glad he hadn't fucked this up, Huskar returned to the fruit. He tried to find the point where he had stopped talking, couldn't remember and began with another story. The Assassin stayed much longer than the last times and whenever he snuck a peek at her, which he did so often that he needed unbelievably long to finish his task, she always smiled a little bit.

Suddenly she stood next to him. "I have to go. Thank you for today." She brushed her palm over his cheek to his nape, her fingers in his hair. Then she stepped closer and hugged him. She wasn't much smaller, fitting nicely against him. She was firm and it wasn't a soft hug. But damn it felt nice. Then she was gone.

Huskar stared at the spot where she had just been standing, then at the cushion she had been sitting on before.

Fascinating.

From then on it got better. They had this routine and Huskar really enjoyed it. The Phantom Assassin asked him to tell her more about his live and his tribe. So he talked and talked. He wondered if she didn't find it boring, but whenever he looked at her from whatever he was doing, she always seemed to listen intently to what he was telling her. She smiled this tiny hint of a smile often and it made Huskar's heart lighter.

At night he sometimes wondered what they were doing and where this was going, but he was afraid to ask her and so he tried to take every day as it came without worrying about the future. She was there and he was just glad about it.

It was bound to go wrong one day. And it did.


	8. Chapter 7

The Phantom Assassin hadn't shown up for two days and Huskar was getting really nervous. She hadn't said anything about a job or something, but she had never done that before anyway. She had never told him when she would come or when she would have to leave. She had just shown up and had always only said when she had to leave the moment she had gotten ready to do so. She herself had probably always had a plan but she had never told him about it. Huskar hadn't minded, until now.

He didn't know where she was, didn't know what she was doing. For all he knew she could be dead, killed in a job, in a battle, in an accident. He hated it. But there was nothing he could do. If he showed up at the domicile of the Veiled Sisters he wouldn't get any information. As if the sisters would tell him anything.

Huskar stared into the setting sun. Two whole days without any sign from her. And he was helpless. When she finally showed up another two days later, Huskar was already half crazy. He hadn't slept, he hadn't eaten, he had even thought about taking the drugs from the Shadow Priest again.

He felt her presence the moment she appeared and he couldn't help it, he rushed forward to hug her. He pressed her as close as possible without crushing her and buried his face in her neck, inhaling deeply. She was alive, she was here and he was so relieved he could've wept. He didn't but he wasn't able to let her go, either. After a few moments the Assassin relaxed in his hold. Then she did something Huskar would never have expected: She put one arm around him and one hand on his neck, her fingers stroking over his skin while she hummed an almost inaudible tone. Satisfied, that was what it sounded like. At ease. And a bit happy. It wasn't the fact that she touched him, she had done that a few times by now, but the way she touched him. Huskar's breath caught at the unexpected tenderness of the moment.

"It's alright, you can let go of me now." But the Assassin didn't sound annoyed or upset. Rather a little amused and still satisfied.

"I don't want to. You were gone four whole days, please let me hug you just a bit more." Huskar felt raw and vulnerable. It wasn't easy for him to ask this but he couldn't release her yet. He had fucking missed her!

She didn't comment on it, she simply stayed where she was, slowly petting Huskar while he hugged her. And the tension left his body. All of a sudden, he was tired. Bone-deep tired. It was only logical, he hadn't slept in days and now that the reason for his insomnia was gone his body shut down. He didn't remember anything after that.

When he woke up, he was alone. But there was a bowl of something to eat next to his bed and some water. There was also a small note, pinned to the wood of his small desk. With a knife. Huskar shook his head as he pulled the knife out. That was absolutely unnecessary, now he had a cut in his table. Maybe that was some assassin habit.

_See you later._

That was all the note said. Huskar snorted. Not that he had expected more, but it sounded so much like the Assassin. It was nice of her to leave a note, though. Surprising and nice.

The food in the bowl was strange. It was unidentifiable but it wasn't the worst the troll had ever eaten. He wondered if she had made it out of the stuff he had in his kitchen but he wasn't sure.

Full and finally not tired anymore, Huskar even smiled as he stepped outside of his house.

"Thank you for leaving me a note." He smiled at the Assassin, who had just appeared at the edge of his garden.

The Phantom Assassin nodded. "You asked me to, and it isn't that hard."

"I did?" He couldn't remember.

"Yesterday, before you passed out. You said it was very important to you."

The Warrior tried to recall it. He also tried to recall if he had said anything else, but couldn't. He sighed.

"I understand it." The Assassin drew closer, her gaze very focussed on him. "If you were gone without telling me where you went and how long you'd be gone I'd hunt you down." There was an intensity to her words, as well as to her expression, that astounded Huskar. He tried to remember from before, when he had thought sensing her was his imagination. It had always been there, the feeling of her being around. Even when he had changed places, it had never been gone for long. He couldn't remember if he had sensed her every day or not. But even so, it wouldn't be remarkable. She was the Phantom Assassin, it probably took her no effort at all to track him down.

Fascinating however was that she let him see that much about herself. The words as well as the way she pinned him with her eyes.

She stood right in front of him, so close that he could see the tiny freckles on her nose. He didn't dare move or say anything. She was so beautiful, her eyes bright and this determined set to her jaw. It was the only thing that changed on her features, from expressionless to determined. It was never there during a battle, as if it was no challenge to fight. It was there now and Huskar wondered if it was a challenge for her to be his mate, to be around him, to talk and interact or if it was something else. He forgot his train of thought when she pressed her hand against his cheek.

She slowly shifted it to his neck. For a moment, she didn't move. Then she fisted her fingers into his hair, while she grabbed his belt with her other hand, locking him in place. It wasn't because her hold was strong but because she obviously didn't want him to move. So he wouldn't.

The Phantom Assassin was almost as tall as him, though it was because he never stood up straight.

They stared into each other's eyes, neither doing anything.

Touching her and being touched by her wasn't new anymore. They did so often enough, before the Assassin left or when she arrived. But so far it had only been hugs. Nice, long hugs but nothing more. This was different though and Huskar became slightly nervous. He wanted to put his hands on her, to feel her against his fingers but he didn't dare move. Too many times she had vanished out of his hold. She was like some skittish animal, not because she was afraid of him but probably because she wasn't used to any kind of intimacy. As soon as she decided it was enough, she was gone. So she was in charge, completely and always.

It wasn't a problem for Huskar, not in general. It was just that this, waiting for the Phantom Assassin to do something, anything, without the slightest idea of what might come, was driving him crazy. His body was too tense, his heart beat way too fast and he was getting slightly light-headed from it all. And then, it wasn't the worst of feelings. It was fascinating to feel that way, just because his mate stood in front of him, not even doing anything at all.

When she leaned closer, his mind went blank. When her lips brushed against his, his whole body felt as if it burst into flames. He hadn't expected it, was never sure what to expect from her.

Her lips were astonishingly soft as they pressed more insistently against his. Huskar couldn't hold back. Her looped one arm around her lower back to bring her closer. And thank the gods she didn't push him away. Instead she sighed almost inaudibly before her tongue flicked against his lower lip.

Huskar couldn't think, he was overwhelmed with pleasure. To be touched by his soulmate, he had never known anything could be this amazing and wonderful. It was still a simple kiss! He began to shake all over. The Assassin pulled back, but only a little. "What is wrong?"

"Nothing." Not really. It was just too much, he guessed. After all this time without her, after he had thought he'd be forever without her, it was simply too much. "I…" He wouldn't say it. Not now. It was too soon, but it was there, in his head and on hits tongue, and the shaking only intensified. His whole body trembled and he pressed his eyes shut to concentrate on it, to make it stop. When he opened them again, the Assassin was looking at him, a tiny crease between her brows.

"I love you." The words burst out though he didn't want it. He grimaced, couldn't take them back now that he had blurted them out like some idiot. Fuck.

But the Assassin was still there, in his arms. She said nothing for a long moment, but then she kissed him. Soft and tender, her kiss as well as her touch. And Huskar thought he could feel her response. It could be his imagination, but he was sure it was there, her love for him. In the way she pressed closer, in the way her fingers moved over his body, in the way her mouth opened to his. It was there in the fact she came to him every day, that she spent time with him though she wasn't supposed to, that she touched him and let him touch her even though she wasn't used to physical contact. It was enough, and though the shaking didn't completely go away, Huskar felt lighter. His heart was lighter now that he had told her what he felt.

They stopped kissing, their foreheads pressed together, their bodies touching. Huskar had his eyes closed to savour the sensation.

"I have to go." The Assassin stroked through his hair one more time before she slowly pulled out of his arms. No sudden vanishing this time. For a moment she stood there, staring at him. She was beautiful and dangerous and nothing about her hinted at her having just necked with him. "My name is Mortred." Then she was gone.

Fucking shit, she had given him her name. A Veiled Sister, a creature without a name so they were all the same, identical and unidentifiable. Assassins all alike, shadows that killed with precision.

Huskar grinned from ear to ear. And he couldn't stop for the remainder of the day. To have her name, it was the highest of honours. It was a sign of her trust. It was the best gift she could've ever given him.


	9. Chapter 8

"I thought about what you said." Huskar had felt when Mortred had arrived but he hadn't expected her to start talking immediately.

"What? What did I say?" It wasn't that he had said nothing, it was more that he said so much.

"That you love me."

Just like that, he was tense all over. A conversation that started like this couldn't be a good one. He had known that it was too soon. Fucking shit. Huskar tried to ready himself for whatever was about to come but he wasn't sure it worked.

She didn't look at him, which made him only more nervous. He was prepared for the worst.

"I do, too."

Huskar blinked, not really trusting his ears. "What?" He stared at her, wanting to be relieved but he couldn't yet believe it. It was one of these things that fell under the category: too good to be true.

Now she lifted her head. Determined set to her jaw. "I do, too."

That was something he really hadn't expected. She had given him her name and now that. She hadn't used the words, but she at least said she felt the same way. It was amazing. He had to touch her, to frame her face with his hands and kiss her. She was here, his mate, and she said she loved him. Fuck, this was amazing. The first hint of relief that he had felt when she had said it the first time was swamped by joy. And by love. And then by need.

She met him half way as he reached for her. There was nothing tender about their touch today. It was a little frantic, maybe laced with desperation. Not that Huskar hadn't felt desperate whenever he had touched her, but it was the first time that it was mirrored back from Mortred. She ran her hands over his body as if she couldn't get enough. She pressed as close as it could ever be possible. And the way she kissed him. As if this was their last time together, as if she wanted to take everything she could. As if this, as if he was the most important thing for her in the world right now.

Considering that she was the most important thing for him, he could only hope that she felt the same. Huskar was still a little afraid to rush this, but with every kiss and every touch from the Assassin he lost more of his ability to think straight. She was all around him, her touch, her smell, how she felt under his hands and he couldn't stop. He broke from the kiss only to rub his cheek against her neck and take a deep breath. He took her scent in, wanted to have it branded into his mind.

Impatiently she pulled at his hair to have his mouth back against hers. Huskar growled, but in approval. He liked that she showed what she wanted, and he liked that she wasn't careful with it. She didn't have to be, whatever she might do, he'd be absolutely able to stand it. And he might even like it a little rough and bossy.

Mortred definitely knew what she wanted today. Because a moment later, her shoulder armour and cape dropped to the floor. She had stopped wearing a helmet in his home a long time ago, almost from the beginning. Huskar had seen it as a sign of trust, but she had never discarded any of her other armour.

It was followed by her bracers and her belt, including her throwing knifes. Mortred took a step back. She was breathing heavily, but the determination hadn't left her features. It was laced with something more, though, and Huskar was desperate to keep touching and kissing her. But she set the pace, as always, and she had stopped. He stood there and stared at her, less clothed than she had ever been around here. He hoped the fuck that she'd keep going.

Her eyes roamed over his body. Huskar, as always, only wore his leathern loincloth and his bracers. He put anything else on, which wasn't much more, when he left his home. She had seen him thousands of times like this, but the way she kept looking now, it could as well have been the first time.

"You are gorgeous."

Huskar blinked at the unexpected words. Then he grinned and shifted slightly, so his muscles would flex.

Mortred's gaze snapped to his face. Her smile, even if it was only very small, took Huskar's breath away and he moved forward to cup her face with his hands. "So beautiful", he murmured before he kissed her.

From there he couldn't hold back any longer. He fumbled with the fastenings of her armour and with her help was able to get it off. She was all lean muscles underneath his hands, soft skin but all hard body. Her breasts were fixed with some stripes of cloth, which came off rather easily. He wanted to look, he burned to look, but he wouldn't stop kissing her for anything in the world today. He could touch though, even if he was still surprised that she let him, that she was half naked, that she was here and kissing him and that she had said she loved him. It was so much, almost too much, and he was drowning in emotions.

Combined with his growing arousal he felt as if he was on fire.

He would have never thought that this might one day happen and he was a little overwhelmed by it. At least Mortred seemed to be sure. Her movements as she pulled her boots off as well as her pants, without ever stopping kissing him were precise. As always. Then she removed Huskar's loin cloth with a swift motion that was too fast for him to register. One moment he had it on, the next it was gone.

Both naked, the Assassin pressed against him, as close as possible, their whole bodies touching. She wasn't small but compared to the troll she was only a wisp of a thing. But she was so strong, so fast and so deadly, dangerous even next to him. A shudder raced down Huskar's spine. Fuck, he loved her, everything about her.

Then she touched him, wrapped her hand around him, without hesitation, without a doubt about what she wanted. The troll growled deep in his throat, his chest vibrating with it.

Mortred sighed. A tiny sound against his growl, but he heard it and felt it, her body relaxing, melting against his. She'd drive him crazy, just like that. He grabbed her, lifted her up, all the while continuing to kiss her. He nibbled at her lower lip with his sharp teeth, careful not to bite too hard. He wouldn't want to draw blood and her skin was easily pierced.

He carried her to his bed and laid down together with her. He was on top but with a swift turn, Mortred had him on his back, straddling him. She wanted to be in charge and with her hand on his cock and her other hand now tightly gripping his hair he didn't mind one bit. He'd gladly surrender to her will as long as it included her touching him. And kissing him. Fuck, he didn't want her to stop that.

Which posed a tiny problem because he wanted to do so much more. He wanted to look at her naked body, wanted to see all of her, and he wanted to taste her. He wanted to see how she reacted to his mouth on her skin, on her breasts and between her legs. He wanted to lick and suck but he'd have to do all of that another time. Because right now he'd enjoy her mouth on his. He could touch her, which he did. He spread his fingers over her firm arse. The perfect shape. Everything about her was perfect.

"Sorry." Mortred sounded already breathless though they had only been kissing until now. But since Huskar felt slightly light-headed himself he couldn't blame her. "I really want to savour sex with you, but right now I just want to fuck. We'll do a second round and take our time, then. All right?" Her eyes were so bright and he could see how much she wanted him. He could only nod. He didn't mind at all, not when she said she wanted to fuck him. And said they'd do another round of it.

Her mouth was instantly back on his and she bit him hard in his lower lip. Her grip in his hair tightened and she lowered herself onto him. Warm and wet and Huskar couldn't breathe, he gasped, and growled and wanted to move but the Assassin did something to hold him in place and he could only take what she gave.

She didn't take her time, just as she had said. As soon as he was fully inside of her, she shuddered with a sigh. Then she began to fuck him. There was no other word for it, the way she held him in place, her nails biting into his skin, as she moved on him fast and hard. She kept kissing him, seemingly desperate for it. Or at least , when it became too much, had her lips pressed close to his, the two of them sharing their breath, rapid and harsh.

Huskar's head swam and he had to concentrate, not wanting to come right away. Mortred panted and sighed and he was sure she was close as well. Too much pent up sexual energy, this wouldn't take long. But that was fine, it was amazing still, to have her this close, to feel her muscles flexing under his fingers, to have her being in control like this. To have her. They could take their time when they were not this desperate anymore.

"Come." The word held so much command that Huskar's mind didn't even begin to question it until it was too late. His body reacted to it immediately. He came with a harsh groan, but so did his mate.

Mortred shuddered as she lay on top of him, her grip finally loosening, the hand in his hair as well as the one that had been digging into his shoulder. Hard. "I'm sorry." She shuddered again and then sighed. "Next time I won't rush us like that."

With a little laugh Huskar slung his arms around her body and held her close. She had her head rested somewhere between his neck and shoulder and he wasn't sure if this was actually comfortable for her. But she didn't budge one bit and appeared to be absolutely boneless. "I don't mind. It was good." He was a tiny bit surprised about the way his body had reacted to her command, but he decided he didn't really care. He didn't mind giving up control if it was for her. And even less if it brought him such pleasure. He grinned, like a fool. His mate, in his arms. Amazing.

The troll rubbed his head against her hair and sniffed at it. The underlying scent was the same as always, but for the first time it was laced with the smell of sex. Of sex they'd had together. His grin widened.

A small hand slapped his chest. "Stop being so smug."

"I am not smug. I'm happy." He pressed her closer, making her huff as he pressed the air out of her lungs.

Suddenly Mortred tensed. It was in sharp contrast to how relaxed she had been only a second before. Huskar was afraid he had done something wrong and loosened his hold on her. His grin was gone in an instant.

"I'm sorry." The Assassin levelled herself up on her hands and looked down at him. "I have to go." She hesitated, then kissed him softly, lingering for a long moment.

She was swift as she freshened herself up and put her clothes and armour back on. Huskar helped nonetheless. When she was finished, nothing hinted at what they had done. She was the perfect assassin again, clothes neat, weapons ready and an unreadable expression on her face. But before she left, she stepped closer to him. Her features softened, just a tiny bit.

She kissed him. "I love you," Hurskar murmured at her lips. Mortred sighed. It sounded like a happy sigh and really, when she moved back, she was smiling a little bit. She stared into his eyes. The next moment she was gone.

The Sacred Warrior stood there, in the middle of the room, all alone. But for the first time in what felt like forever he was content. He turned and when he saw the bed he grinned. He was still naked but he had a few things to do in and around the house so he put at least his loincloth back on.

Fuck, he was happy. He wasn't the least annoyed that Mortred had had to leave. This was her job and everyone could see that it was in her blood to do this. So he didn't mind. As long as she'd come back to him he didn't mind. And that was something she had proven over and over, even when he had still thought he imagined her presence. She had always been with him.

The next week was fun. As soon as Mortred was around, they touched and kissed. They didn't fuck all the time, though they did so often, but they also did what they had before. They read or cleaned weapons and armour or Huskar cooked. They hunted together and even went to the occasional town war together. Because Huskar loved to watch his mate fight. It was amazing, as if they were truly in a relationship. The Assassin had to leave now and then for her jobs, but she always came back. The only thing that bothered Huskar was, that she still left for the night.

"Because someone will notice when I'm absent during the night while not having an assignment."

Huskar understood it, but he didn't like it one bit. Not only because she wasn't there during the night, but also because it meant that what they were doing was a secret. And secrets had a way of getting out. Always. Especially considering how long they'd live and how much time there was for a secret to get out. And because she was a Veiled Sister, maybe the best of the assassins, but they were all very good and one of her sisters would eventually get suspicious.

He didn't say anything because it wasn't his place to interfere with her work and he was still so happy to have her that he didn't want to fuck everything up. It did loom over them (at least to him it felt like that) like a shadow all the time. Not when Mortred was around, he was fixated on her then, couldn't think about anything else. Sometimes it was as if he was in a tunnel, he could only see her. He wondered if it was the same for her but didn't dare ask.

Except for his one (or maybe two) slip where he had told her that he loved her he hadn't spoken about feelings at all. Not that he didn't want to but he was glad that she talked to him at all. He didn't want to dump all his emotions onto her. And maybe scare her away with it. This was all too knew and in his opinion still too fragile to chance anything.

Talking about feelings wasn't a topic the troll usually indulged in but with his soulmate he found he wanted to. He wanted to tell her how he felt and he wanted to fucking know about her feelings. He was sure it would simply take a little time and patience. Something he'd had to learn since he had met the Assassin for the first time. He could dig out a little more patience and postpone all the emotional stuff until he felt safer in this relationship and until Mortred had relaxed around him.

It was fine for some time, Mortred leaving for her jobs now and then and for the nights, but except for these times she was always with Huskar. The troll was happy though he was still tense. It seemed to be unsettled what they had, and he was holding back. Sometimes when he looked at her, he wanted to tell her how beautiful she was, how much he loved her, that he wanted to live together with her, to never be apart from her, to have eternity with her. To have a house and a garden and kids and everything. To fall asleep by her side and wake up with her cuddled close. Or him cuddled close, whatever. To learn all about her, the good and the bad, to hear about her life before him, to tell her about his life before her.

He did nothing of it. Well, he did talk about his life, but he always made sure to tell casual stories, nothing that was too personal. He was simply too afraid.

One of them would have to make the first step and it probably had to be Huskar, given how Mortred didn't talk about anything at all. That in itself wasn't bad, Huskar didn't mind. But he was so fucking scared of losing her because he did something dumb. Aside from the fact that she was with him all the time he didn't know how she felt about him, about them. She had said she loved him, not saying the actual words, but she had said it. Considering how little she talked about feelings (never), this had probably been a very huge thing for her, but still he could only assume so.

"Are you all right?" Huskar snapped out of his thoughts at the question from the Assassin. She was lounging, and she really was, there was no better expression for it, on the cushion in the living room. It had become her favourite place. "You seem to be sad." She frowned as she asked him, and Huskar was dumbfounded, that she sensed that something was off and that she brought it up and asked him about it.

This was the moment, he could tell her about his feelings because she had started this conversation, he wouldn't even dump it on her unasked. Still he hesitated. He didn't want to chase her away with it, so he'd take all these feelings and lock them up inside of him, to not let them slip out. He didn't have to talk about feelings.

He shook his head and smiled. "I'm just a bit tired."

For a moment he thought she'd call him a liar and push on. The tiny frown between her brows deepened, but then she continued to read her book. She was more tense than usual, though, and Huskar felt bad about not telling her what was bothering him. He was still too afraid, though.

The remaining day together was strange. Huskar tried to be as normal as possible but Mortred didn't relax completely. The next day it was gone, their interaction as usual.


	10. Chapter 9

Unsurprisingly, the problem they had been avoiding caught up to them. It did, when they were both in the living room. Mortred clearly sensed something, because she jumped up and had her weapons in her hands before Huskar realized she had moved. Still it was too late.

In the blink of an eye, they were surrounded. Seven assassins, Veiled Sisters from the look of it, and that were only the ones Huskar could see. He supposed there might be more of them, hidden the way Mortred could.

Since it seemed rather pointless, Huskar didn't even try to grab his weapons. He would never be fast enough against them, even if they were not as fast and deadly as the Phantom Assassin was. He stood up, though, very slowly and stepped closer to Mortred. She was already moving towards him while never taking her eyes off the Veiled Sister in front of her. She appeared to be relaxed but Huskar could see the tension in her body. She was ready to attack if anyone made the wrong move.

"Sister." One of the assassins spoke. "We are here to judge you. And eliminate what made you stray from your path."

Mortred tightened the grip on her weapons but her face remained expressionless. She didn't wear her complete set of armour nor her helmet. She had stopped coming fully armoured, which she probably regretted right now. It was clear what the Veiled Sisters wanted: to kill Huskar. He didn't know why they hadn't already done it.

This was what the Assassin had feared, right from the beginning. Because the Veiled Sisters were not allowed to have mates. Suddenly Huskar was very nervous. This was the moment Mortred had tried to avoid. They had never talked about it, not about the fact she wasn't allowed to have a mate but still spent as much time as possible with him, nor about what would happen should the veiled Sisters find out about him. Because one thing was clear: she'd have to choose. The assassins were here to kill him and take her with them. It was they or him.

They were her sisters, probably the closest thing she had to a family. And he was her mate. Huskar couldn't be sure she'd choose him over them and he'd never ask that from her. Though he'd really prefer to stay alive. When he thought about it, he wasn't sure he'd be alive no matter what Mortred would choose. If she wanted to stay with him, the Veiled Sisters would probably kill them both. He stopped moving towards her, not sure if it was the right thing to do. It had seemed natural, mates sticking together, but he didn't know if him being her mate made him more important than them being her sisters. He wasn't sure if it would make a difference, no matter what she thought.

"Do you want to say something in your defence? Not that there would be anything that could justify you spending time with someone not from us."

"He is my mate. If you try to harm him in any way, I'll kill you all." Mortred's voice was low and sharp and though devoid of emotion everyone could hear the determination and seriousness of the statement. Huskar almost didn't believe his ears. She hadn't even thought about it, as if she was completely and without any doubt sure about this. As if she had decided all along and just hadn't bothered to tell him. Well, her saying that she loved him might have been a clue, but it wasn't the logical consequence of it.

"Are you sure you can win that battle?" The Veiled Sister who had been speaking smiled a little, an arrogant smile.

The Phantom Assassin didn't change her expression. "Are you sure you can? It would be hard for you against only me, but against me and the Sacred Warrior? You do know how strong he is, don't you?"

The smiled wavered. Then: "You are weaker because of him. When we harm him, you'll lose your focus. Because you'll be afraid to lose him."

"Are you ready to try this theory? I know what he is capable of, that he becomes stronger with every injury he receives. I've seen him fighting and I'm not afraid for him. I warn you, because I don't want to hurt any of you. You are my sisters, not in blood but in heart. But I will kill you if you harm my mate. Not because he isn't able to take it, but because I won't tolerate it."

The two stared at each other while Huskar tried to process the words he'd heard. He wondered if she really saw him like that, as strong enough not to be a burden for her. He knew what she was capable of and he'd never even imagine defeating her. Either her sisters were much weaker or she was bluffing. Or she had an higher opinion of his skills than he himself had.

"It is against our law." To bring this argument was the sign for defeat. The Veiled Sister wouldn't attack them. Maybe it was because she was afraid, or it was because she saw how important Huskar was for her sister. The Phantom Assassin realized it, too, because the set of her shoulders changed slightly.

"I know. I am willing to leave the Veiled Sisters."

"That is even more against the law!" The sister sounded incredulous, as much as Huskar felt at the statement. This was her life she was offering to give up. For him! She was so much an assassin, a Veiled Sister, and she put him above it. The troll wondered if he had done or offered to do something similar for her, and he didn't think he had.

"I can come with you, stay at yours, wherever you are all living, and never leave." Before she'd be without her sisters, he'd be without his family. He hadn't seen them in forever anyway, was probably not a big loss. He hadn't thought it through, but it sounded like a reasonable thing to offer.

"You can't!" The Veiled Sister was clearly out of her depth with this whole situation. But now it was Mortred's turn to be perplexed. So much so, that she couldn't even hide it. She looked at Huskar, ignoring all the assassins around them, her eyes wide. She didn't say anything, just stared, so the troll winked at her with a smile. As if he wasn't willing to do everything for her. He could understand her shock, though, considering he had been shocked only moments before by her willingness.

But they were at an impasse here. Neither Huskar nor Mortred would back down, they wouldn't give up their mate. And the Veiled Sisters seemed to be unsure if they could take them down, so they stood there, staring at each other, neither of them moving. Huskar was unbelievably happy that Mortred chose him, over everything. He grinned like a fool, but the benefit of it was that he looked even scarier that way. Mortred seemed to be pleased as well, not that the troll could make out any emotions on her features, but he was sure about it.

With a sight, the Veiled Sister took a step back. "Don't move." Then she ported away.

The other assassins held their positions but Huskar decided it was relatively safe now to change his focus to Mortred. She must've thought the same, because she was already looking at him. For a moment, nothing changed, then she smiled. It was only a little bit, but it made Huskar grin even more. It was ridiculous and his face was starting to hurt from it. But though this situation was what he had feared most, he felt good. He had been afraid that Mortred would leave him, but this was fine. He didn't care if he had to forever live with the Veiled Sisters as long as he had his mate. As long as he had his Phantom Assassin. And if the stupid assassins really tried to kill him or them both, he was astonishingly confident that they stood a chance. Mortred seemed to be confident about it and he trusted her.

They didn't talk, just smiled, respectively grinned, at each other. Until a few minutes later the Veiled Sister who had been talking all the time appeared again. The Phantom Assassin was expressionless and alert even before Huskar realized the Veiled Sister was back.

Something passed between the assassins, some communication the troll didn't understand. Then they all disappeared. Only the one stayed. She ignored Huskar. "If he is used against you by anyone, we won't help you. He is your weak spot and you know it. He won't be allowed to live with us so it is up to you how you'll keep him safe. You are allowed to do as you please as long as you do your job. If you don't, this decision will be revised." She seemed to want to leave, but hesitated. "I hope you'll be happy. And I hope you won't forget us."

Finally Mortred relaxed. She put her weapons away and approached the Veiled Sister. "I already am happy. And even if I won't be home as often as before, you and every other of our sisters is welcome to visit me." She looked at Huskar, then added: "To visit us."

That the Assassin assumed this was a place she could invite someone to was awesome, because it meant she saw it as her home. At least partially. And that she invited her sisters to visit not only her, but him too, it was perfect. Because it meant they belonged together. Huskar's grin got even wider than before and he thought he'd explode with all the happiness bubbling inside him. Him! That he was even thinking about bubbling happiness was strange enough. But then this was his soulmate and ones mate should be the most important creature in ones life. Happiness about her choosing him over everything else was probably justified.

As soon as the last Veiled Sister had left, he couldn't contain himself any longer. The troll rushed towards the Assassin, hugged her and buried his face in her hair. "I love you, I love you so fucking much! Thank you, for being with me and for standing beside me and for everything."

He could feel Mortred smiling against his neck. "I didn't think it would be this easy. Or I would've confronted them a long time ago. I'm really glad it went this well. I didn't want to choose between you and them, but as soon as they stood here, I knew what I wanted." She pushed him away, but only enough to be able to look at him. "I never thought I'd find my mate and I never ever thought, even if, that I could be happy with my mate. But I did and I am. Thank you for being this persistent and not giving up right at the beginning." Her smile grew wider, a real smile, not only a hint of one. "I love you too."

And this, this was by far the happiest day in Huskar's live. Up to now. There would come more, one day better than the other. Not all of them, of course not, that was illogical, but it was still amazing how perfect a day with ones mate could be.

Every fear he'd had about Mortred leaving him, it was gone. Maybe he dumped all his emotional stuff on her from that day on, but to his astonishment, she didn't mind. She was by far not as emotional as him, and that said much for a troll and warrior, but she smiled whenever he told her how much she meant to him. She smiled and sighed and pressed close to him and he knew by now that it was her way of showing him how much he meant to her.


End file.
